IT’S NOT SELFISH! Making You, Your Number one!


Not selfish quote -self love

It’s not selfish to put yourself first; to love yourself, and to make you your number one priority, it’s a necessity! People seem to have it in their heads that they have to be giving as that is part of loving others, and while they have a fair point, you need to have boundaries in place and not compromise yourself out of all recognition. In fact, you DON’T have to compromise yourself, as your needs should be your priority, so you must do what is overall best for you, as you are the one who has to live with yourself day in and day out! This means you need to  choose relationships and friendships that best compliment your personality, your life and lifestyle. Notice I said compliment, they don’t have to exactly match.

The thing is, if you end up giving, whilst not really living the life you want to lead, or doing anything you want to do, you will no longer feel connected to your own soul and this could have serious repercussions in your current and future relationships. You may feel resentful without meaning to be, you may feel confused about what you want, you may not know who you are!

This was me years ago, before my diagnosis of Fibro and now I come first. No more housework for a guy, if I get a boyfriend in the future. No more sex, as I now know I am asexual – not a sexual – and there are thousands of others like me around the globe! No more having to relationship compromise and put your partner first – no, I come first, if I had a partner, every single time. I live on my own, I am responsible for my bills and my rent and food in my belly, I still need to take care of me, he can look after himself, just like I can look after myself, I am a girl – not a mother and cleaner upper! This is not the conventional attitude, I know, but this is me! I don’t like cooking, cleaning and housework – and I also don’t like watching sport or TV – so I don’t! I live for me and that is fab. I also enjoy staying up until 2am or 4am in the morning. Of course I am caring, but that can be taken advantage of – so no more am I a doormat! No more do I have to think of others all the time. I have to focus on me more to be happy. And I can tell you from suffering with depression for most of my life prior to 2012, that this attitude is one that I should have adopted years ago as now I love jumping out of bed every day, even when life is tough. I love being alive, and I love life and living it my quirky and unconventional way! Do I feel a bit guilty sometimes – do I feel I will be judged as being bad and uncaring – yes, I do feel this sometimes, because I think it can sound cold and uncaring to be this way, (even though I am very kind and caring), as that is not what is traditionally expected – especially of a female! Will I change back – no, never. I am not saying I will never ever cook food for a guy, but I won’t make a habit of it, and I will set the record from the beginning my expectations. And yes, I want to remain living on my own, maybe forever. I love where I live, because I live on my own but in the middle of a house so have the best of both worlds!

So don’t ever feel selfish to self-date and take time out for you. The happier and healthier you are in your own right, the better off you will be for others. I am living proof of that. That is how I feel. I also know I can survive and thrive on life because of this. And don’t ever feel selfish living your life, your own quirky way! There is no way I would want to be at home watching TV and going to bed at a reasonable hour each day, and living a normal life – I would be so very bored, unmotivated, and feel older – I am young, quirky, 21st mindset me! The best way to be!

Always remember that I love you lots for being quirky you, and thanks always for your support and for stopping by my blog and touching my life, it means so very much xx

As always, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xxxxxxxx

SaveSave

Advertisements

Quirky Quotes For Beautifully Quirky People – Quirky Books!


Quirky Quote From Sandra Bellamy

Some people believe that being different is not good, as they don’t fit in. They can be seen by society as an oddball, weird, strange, eccentric, and far out. But what you have to remember, is being different is very beautiful and that if you are different, it is because you are born for the purpose of standing out from a crowd, and this means there is an underlying reason why you are alive and you have a specific purpose and reason why you are on this earth. If you were meant to be on this earth, and go about your daily life like everyone else, you would not be blessed with the ability to survive as an individualist, in fact, if you dig deep, you will find that you are not just born for surviving, you are born for far more than the average person, because you are not average, you are unique, and different, and that means you are a special, chosen one. But chosen for what? Is what you must always seek the answer to throughout your life. Even when you think you have achieved that or got that, you will know there are other life missions just around the corner to stretch and grow you as a person and your magnificent brain.

Yes, everyone is different, but not everyone knows it, feels it, or acts like it. Not everyone is being true to themselves or living their true authentic life. But you know, if you are consciously aware of your difference, that you cannot help but be different, it’s because you are, and your mission must always be to find out your why in life, and your bigger why, and the bigger picture. Make this your mission to always seek answers and allow your intuition to guide you and find them!!

Until next time, always stay your beautiful quirky self and write soon, Sandra xx

P.S. If you are looking for a Quirky Book, you can check out my www.quirky-books.com or www.quirkybooks.net site or check out my shop page on Amazon http://amzn.to/2Evf30M

P.P.S. To find out more about me, check out www.sandrabellamy.com and www.sandrabellamy.co.uk

Do You See Your Beauty? Inspirational/Motivational Poem By Sandra Bellamy


Do You See Your Beauty? Inspirational/Motivational Poem By Sandra Bellamy. Do you see your beauty, or do you see a tree …

 

I am off to London tomorrow and EuroDisney on Sunday 23rd April for my 21st Mindset birthday celebration – 7 whole days, one week of quirky teenage fun. This is when I get to be truly me 24/7, not work, apart from Facebook video and posts from the park!! Join me on my 21st Mindset Birthday on my www.facebook.com/quirkybooksnet page, on my birthday, Monday 24th of April, and see posts and updates from me on that day in Disneyland Paris xx Permission to wear anything Disney, Super-hero, fun, post your pics on there. Theme is Disney and to have the mindset of a 21 year old or younger. You have to think, act and be, like a 21 year old, and see how much you can achieve, with no hang-ups, no worries, no caring what people think and just having a blast! Be unstoppable!! Stay quirky always xx I am in the actual park from 23-27th of April and back in London again on the 28th!!

Happy Quirkimas!


Musical Christmas toys in my bedroom at my parents
Tree lit up in my bedroom at my parent’s
Frozen Christmas card
Christmas Tree in my home

Have a very Happy Quirkimas with many more quirky days to follow xx Love and Hugsxx

Shrektastic!


 

 

img_1647img_1645img_1650img_1653

When I went to London in October I went to Shrek Adventureland after my two day seminar was finished. I went twice. Here are some photos from the first time I went.

 

Enjoy and stay Quirky

Sandra

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This slideshow requires JavaScript.

Off To The Vets Again! 


My furry kids Snow and Chestnut
Snow (White) and Chestnut.

I love my Snow, she literally means the world to me and tomorrow she goes under anesthetic again. And she seems to be handling this news a lot better than me!

This morning I bathed her and Chestnut before work and you could see all the more, how much weight she has lost. Although her eyes and still bright and she is still strong inside and feisty – pushing past Chestnut at times and trying to climb out of the sink I bathed her in this morning. This is a recent picture of her before the most dramatic weight loss over this week. 

On Friday she was dropping some piggie mix from her mouth and coupled with the weight loss, I felt it was best to get her to see a vet that day. Chestnut always goes with her – good job, as Snow was diagnosed with mites aside from possibly her teeth being overgrown again and confirmed weight loss. She was 1kg on 31st May, now 8.08. But both have to have mite treatment and Chestnut has to be weighed for this too.

The vet could not see Snow’s teeth for the tongue being attached to her cheeks so tomorrow the head vet will anesthetise her to take a closer look at what is going on! I pray it is nothing worse and that Snow will be okay.

I am feeling sad now so going to say write soon and always follow your heart!

Love and hugs

Sandra xx

Dear Diary – I’ve Missed You: A Night Time Poem For Writer’s


Dear Diary – I’ve Missed You: A Night Time Poem For Writer’s

It’s been a while since I really let rip my writing talent in my diary. This night it felt so good to get back into writing and just let it flow throughout my soul. This was a poem that just poured out of me and I wanted to share it with you.

Stay quirky

Sandra

Give Yourself A Gift In 2016


image

image

Father Christmas Hand Muff
image

Give Yourself A Gift In 2016. Whether that is a physical present, the gift of feeling alive, of being happy to be you with all of your quirks, or just to feel blessed in the moment – all of these are essential to your own health and wellbeing.

Life is not always easy, there will be times when you will struggle and ask why did this happen to me, but know you can and will get through those hard times – they shall pass and you will not only survive, but come to thrive, because those times made you stronger.

Giving yourself gifts regularly however large or small, helps to take care of the inner you; to feel love, cherished and nourished throughout your soul.

The best gift I got this week, was the gift of life still living – Snow had to have surgery to remove spores from her teeth on Monday 4th January, after being unable to eat or drink barely anything due to the pain she was in. Thankfully she started eating that night after her operation, while staying at my mum and dad’s; and she started drinking out of her water bottle again yesterday. She has to be on medication for 7 days and my parents are looking after her during her recovery while I am working. My mum is also better at administering her medicine than me – I often miss her mouth! Chestnut is with her.

Monday the 4th was also a huge day for me because I was filmed by Lori to be in an asexual documentary to raise awareness, and it counts as 50% marks for her degree. She came all the way from London to Exeter to film me in my home and will be coming twice more. When it’s finished it will be 7 minutes long and on YouTube.

I have launched my Quirky T Shirt brand on Amazon.com and have 4 new designs live on there so far. I have bought that domain and will be building that site this year, to link through to Amazon.com, who I have partnered with to print and send the T-Shirts to customers. I create the designs and pay a professional designer to do the artwork.

I date myself and must get back to doing more of that in 2016. I also like buying myself gifts sometimes, and for Christmas 2015, I bought myself this Father Christmas hand muff and I bought myself this Iron Man alarm clock as a slightly belated New Year’s gift to myself. One of my alarm clocks broke before Christmas and he was so cute, reduced heavily in price, and the last one left, I just had to buy him. I felt it was intuitively meant to be. Iron Man is my favourite Marvel character and I love robots. The fact he lights up is sensational, and adds to the magic and wonder of this special, no so little alarm clock.

I did manage to fit a date in with myself recently and saw the new Star Wars movie in 3D, I didn’t realise it was a subtitled performance, but I still enjoyed it. I thought it was amazing.

I will be posting regular videos again soon on my http://www.youtube.com/quirkybooksTV channel – However, I will be going through the chapters of My Break Through The Barriers Of Redundancy To Get Back Into Work – An A-Z ‘How To’ Guide, and giving you some key points from each one for free, to help you with your own personal and professional development. I will also be doing more videos to help you in this way throughout 2016, in line with my Quirky Academy mission to helps others with their personal and professional development, all the while embracing your quirky.

What gifts do you like to give yourself?

Stay quirky.
Write soon.

Sandra xx