Quirky Books Author Sandra Bellamy Hosts WORLD’S FIRST Ever ASEXUALITY Daily Live Stream Chat Show! Asexualise My Asexual Life


I thought I was heterosexual for years, but I just didn’t like sex, as I didn’t associate sex with love, but loved to kiss. But when I realised I could no longer have sex, I just couldn’t bring myself to do it ever again, and I nearly wet myself because I was fearful of dating sexuals because of the expectation of sex at the end of the date, I knew something had to be done about it, because I felt I was the only one in the entire world, planet and universe that felt this. So I went to see a counsellor. But… it didn’t go well at all. She said the worse thing in the world, that I really didn’t want to hear. And that was if I wanted a relationship, I must have sex in order to keep a good guy. Something seemed very flawed about this perspective. If the guy was a good guy, why would he want me to do things that were not good for me, as part of a relationship with me! To me that made no sense. It was like giving a license for rape to happen, disguised as what a ‘good guy’ would be allowed to do, in order for me to keep him! This defied all my reasonable ‘healthy-for-me’ logic! So I went home and Google “I love kissing and not sex” and that is when I came across Asexuality.org and realised there were others like me who didn’t like sex, and who didn’t need it in a romantic relationship to be happy. And that’s when I discovered I am indeed a heteroromantic asexual, not heterosexual.

That was in 2014, when I first discovered I am Asexual. Back then, I couldn’t talk about sex publicly or about my past sexual relationships publicly. I had almost given up completely on the idea of having a relationship and dating ever again. And my past relationships weren’t great, but the opposite.

In October 2015, for Asexual Awareness Week, I decided to get out of my comfort zone, open up about past sexual relationships, and announce to the world, that I am in fact, a heteroromantic asexual! On my www.youtube.com/asexualisemyasexuallife channel. It took me awhile to get used to speaking openly on my channel, but when I received comments from viewers, that they found my videos helpful and they were glad they found my channel, it made me happy to continue to create and upload videos and I decided to not copy other asexuality channels, just to become popular, but to share my own asexual life journey in order to help others, to empower asexuals to be comfortable and confident with their own Asexuality, and to educate others! Little did I know back then, how this channel would grow into the unique Asexualise My Asexual Life, Asexuality late night chat show it is today!

In 2017, I published my first ever book for Asexuals, called Asexual Perspectives 47 Asexual Stories, Love, Life and Sex, ACElebration of Diversity, under my own publishing imprint of Quirky Books. Little did I know at the time, just how popular this book would be and continues to be, to this day. Helping asexuals, those who lack sexual attraction, and who are a recorded 1% of the population, to know there are others like them in the world, who don’t get the need, urge, or want, for partnered sexual intercourse, and to know it’s okay, you are not alone and that sex does not equal love, and it is possible to live, love, and be happy, without sex forever, in a loving, happy, and healthy relationship, be it romantic or platonic, or if you don’t ever want to be ‘in a relationship’ it’s okay! (I am currently working on my second book for asexuals which will be published in 2020, with 4 more books planned for asexuals. Each book focuses on different topics, within the asexual spectrum!) So if you are a writer who is struggling at the moment, know you won’t be rich overnight, you might not be rich in money terms, for a very long time, but you will be one of the wealthiest people in that world, because you can really change lives with your written words, and that is why you should be a writer and Author of books, because you love writing so much and you want too change lives for the better forever. I regularly get people private messaging me about how this book has literally change their life, for the better, forever. And also, how much my videos on www.youtube.com/asexualisemyasexuallife have really helped them, especially when they first discovered they are asexual. I get people who are not asexual watching my channel, but the respective fact I am, subscribing to it, and becoming one of my most loyal viewers. I know I can help those people too and you.

In July 2018, I wanted to do something special for Asexual Perspectives Awareness Month, so I started to live stream on my channel, every day, for 31 days. But when the 31 days was over! I got the bug for live streaming. I realised how many more asexuals I could help, rather than in private message one-on-one, if I just let anyone and everyone ask me questions directly in the live stream chat. I could offer something unique, that no other asexuality channel was offering. A way to get instant answers about asexuality, about my own life experiences, and to help other asexuals to overcome depression, like I had done in 2012; lower their anxiety, and get a better mindset and a better quality of life! Fast forward to today, and I am still live streaming daily, but now it’s evolved into being an online daily late night chat show which at its heart, is a Personal Development and Personal Growth channel for Asexuals, and the world’s first of its kind. Specialising in, Asexuality/Surviving and thriving as an asexual in this highly sexualised world, Dating/Relationships, Spirituality/Mindset, Personal Growth/Self-Love. I also do ‘no sex’ movie reviews. These days, it’s not uncommon for many (not all), of my streams to last over an hour, sometimes two, and the odd occasion has even been over 3 hours long. All of that time has been spent helping asexuals for free, and non-asexuals who also form part of my regular viewership. So on average 7-14 hours a week! My live streams most often start after 11pm UK time.

I have been learning about personal and professional development since 2012. I have also been heavily involved in the Asexual relationships and dating scene, with being on Asexual dating sites since 2014, running 3 Asexual dating Facebook groups, and learning a lot more about healthy dating and relationships dynamics since studying a pattern changing course in 2013, and subsequently learning much more in the last couple of years. I am keen to help as many asexuals as possible to develop long-lasting healthy friendships and relationships, with life, with love, with others, and with yourself. To help grow you as an individual and realise your true potential and beauty, in your own uniqueness.

I would love you to join my channel community, if you think this is something you could benefit from, please subscribe at www.youtube.com/asexualisemyasexuallife , and hit the bell icon so you get notified whenever I go live, which is usually each and every day, unless for some reason I am staying away from home and have no access to live streaming, such as over Christmas Day, Boxing Day and New Year’s.

If you are a writer, never, ever give up! Don’t wait for a publisher to publish you. Believe in your own work of genius enough to take that leap of faith and self-publish! My Fibromyalgia Self-Help Handbook is also changing lives. One of my best asexual friends is no longer depressed since reading that book, and has been depressed for years before I met them. They were trying to help themselves a lot and get better, and they were making some progress, but nothing seemed to actually stick enough to make a long-lasting change which they so badly needed, but since reading this book, their life has now completely changed, and they are doing things they never thought was possible before, and I am so very proud of them! A how-to, self-help book, is no good, without implementation! He doesn’t have fibromyalgia, but does have another pain condition, and understood that the techniques I explain in this book, about how to have less pain, more energy and be happier, and how to overcome depression and reduce anxiety, can easily be transferred and applied to any circumstances, regardless of it you have fibromyalgia or not! So yes, if you are reading this blog post now, and you want to be happier in your life, have less pain (especially mental pain), and more energy, I absolutely believe you can also benefit from this book too. The new year, 2020, is coming, so with this book, you can have the new upgraded version of you going into 2020, check it out here https://amzn.to/2MBZA1U and take that leap of faith! You won’t be disappointed! You’ll also get to read my own personal real life ACE Fibro Girl story! So if you enjoy reading autobiographical books, you will love this book also!

Here I am as ACE Fibro Girl! Keep writing and stay quirky always, Sandra xx

ACE Fibro Girl book

I Love The Song All I Want For Christmas Is You! But What About The Very Damaging And Dangerous Message It Gives Out?


All I Want For Christmas Is You, is one of my very favourite Christmas songs! If you take it for the airy fairytale romantic notion, and uber catchy tune it is, it’s a great catchy little number to bop along to, but if you take an in-depth look at the words, they send a very damaging and dangerous message! Watch this video below now from my www.youtube.com/quirkybooksTV channel to find out why it’s so damaging, and what you need to do to survive and thrive in this world and make getting into abusive relationships a thing of the past! Make 2020, your best year yet and set the tone now, in 2019, for the best year yet to come!

And if you want a reminder of this song, here is the 2019 edition!

Here are the lyrics xx

Here is a wonderful Christmas song, which is very beautiful for your soul! When you have fun, you attract the one! It all starts with you, and you have fun and laughter regardless!

I wish you a very Happy Christmas Day and Christmas Time, and for all your dreams to come true in 2020!

As always, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

Summits Up! Business, Spirituality, Personal Growth! Don’t Miss Out!


FLY Summit
Do you like business, spirituality, personal growth? If yes, go register for the Freestyle Your Life Authenticity Summit. You will be so glad to learn from 78 experts in their field, exactly what it takes to live your dream as the authentic you, you were always born to be!

Today is the day! If you haven’t already got your FREE ticket to the Authenticity Summit, click here now https://academy.freestyle-your-life.com/Sandrabellamy/2

I am speaking today, on this summit, about Asexuality! Labelled as sharing my heroic life journey, along with other experts in their chosen fields, it’s sure to be a memorable interview.

Sign up and look for an email in your inbox, or check your spam box, click through the link for day 4 and watch!

It’s only are for 24 hours, so be sure not to miss out! (Or you can buy the recording from the event organiser! Erneste Carla Zimmermann)

As always, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

Are You A Blogger, Author, Or Writer? Want More Exposure And Copy That Clicks? Don’t Miss This!


Are you a Blogger, Writer, Author? Do you write blog posts that are shared once and never shared again? Do you struggle to find the right words to spice up your post to create curiosity? Do you spend hours trying to share your posts multiple times over and trying to think up compelling copy to get those clicks? If the answer to any of those is yes, you need Missing Lettr, because is does all the hard work for you, so you don’t have to. Not only does it automate the sharing of your blog posts to multiple social media profiles, it automatically suggests the best hashtags to use and creates compelling post copy, that gets noticed, so you gain more exposure for each of your posts and many more click throughs, all at a fraction of the cost it would take you to hire an expensive social media manager, an expensive copywriter, or to buy expensive copywriting software – and then the time it takes to figure out how to use it. 

Why do all that hard work when you don’t have to? If you are a Blogger, Writer, Author, and you want more exposure, in less time, and get a well oiled machine that does all the hard work for you, so you don’t have to, and you can stop wasting your precious time and do more productive money making tasks, you need to buy this tool.

If you want to know more about how to use this fabulous tool, post that shows you how to do just that, here https://wp.me/p1bntR-42y with a behind-the-scenes look at my dashboard using screenshots, so you can see how valuable it is in action!

It’s incredibly good value for money. I know some other companies who charge much more for this type of thing. The amount of suggested copy you get, to gain more exposure and clicks, is just amazing! It would take you hours alone, just to think up this stuff, and that in itself, saves you so much time. I think this is what sets Missing Lettr apart from other social media automation tools, is that it creates compelling copy to go with your posts, so you don’t have to. Most companies would either not do both, or charge an extortionate amount, particularly for the automatic creation of copy; hundreds of pounds. Buy now here https://goo.gl/RNvo3L

Until next time, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

What Good Is A Blog Post If It’s Only Seen Once? How To Share Your Message To Masses Using Missing Lettr


What good is a blog post if it’s only seen once by its intended audience? Why not use that one blog post, multiple times over and get the reach you want and truly deserve? I love blogging, I’ve always loved blogging and soon it will be my 9th year as a blogging expert! Well, maybe I can call myself that now I have reached that milestone? Don’t you think? In any case, I love it, for me blogging is both therapeutic, educational and entertaining, even for me to write it! I don’t blog because I have to, I blog because I really want to and love it. I love writing. I love blogging because I find it’s conversational, not boring or academic – although I can get technical at times and I love it because it feels like me. I do it as a labour of love and to document my journey into print. Whenever someone reads this blog, they can see, that they too, can become a successful writer. They can learn from my mistakes. They can smile in my own joy, realising that they too, can achieve what once seemed like the impossible and make it possible.

When I first started this blog, I did it for me. That might sound counterintuitive, but that is the truth. I had to learn to find my writer’s voice, however, I also wanted to help other writers because I knew I had the gift of writing by my side. Even though there were blogs that had been around far longer than me, I just knew I had to get started, and I intuitively knew I could help others with their writing, but not only that, with being their QUIRKY, true, authentic self. I knew back then that Quirky Books would one day be my own publishing imprint and that dream came true in 2017.

Back then I was also going through a period of insecurity, of feeling out of control, uneasy in myself and blogging was not only my escape, but also something I could feel in control of, in a time in my life when I felt out of control. My self-esteem was low back then, and my confidence. So for 8 months, I never had a follower, no one had probably ever heard of me. Or if they did, they kept quiet about it. Then one day, out of the blue, I got this one person following me, it never occurred to me at that time that if I wanted people to follow me, I would need to find and follow them first. I didn’t even know what the Reader was, let alone how to use it. I was self-taught, stubborn as a mule, as always, had to learn everything myself. I still like learning for myself, but this time I am willing and able to learn from others and to learn faster than ever before.

But what can be quite frustrating, like I said at the beginning of this post, what if my blog post, my piece of “quirky artwork” as I like to call it, what if it’s only seen once by a handful of people, then what? How can others learn from me and my posts, and more have that special “a-ha” moment, if all I am doing is sharing it once? How is that helping the most people possible? It’s not! Many people die with their message, knowledge, skills and experience inside them. They never get to pass their legacy onto others, and they just accept this, or are never even consciously aware of it, but what if there was a way to share your message to hundreds and even thousands of people, in a really unique and fun way? This is why I bought access to Missing Lettr, because Missing Lettr lets you share your message to the world, in a unique and colourful way. It enables you to create several pieces of unique content across social media and schedule and share these several times over throughout a whole year, set and forget it, on autopilot. So you create it once, select which variations of the posts you want to use, and on which days they suggest you post it and it’s shared multiple times over. Each of their ‘snippet posts’ which HOOK the reader, leads back to your original blog posts! It’s incredible. It’s quirky, it’s different, and it’s fun. And the team really do care about their customers and give excellent customer service after care. So once you have connected your blog/s, to Missing Lettr, it will then automatically, or automagically as I like to call it, transform your blog posts, into short ‘snippet posts’ for your Facebook pages, Facebook Groups and Twitter profiles, and other social media profiles too. It will even suggest the most appropriate and popular hashtags for your posts, (see screenshot below), so you don’t even have to think about this yourself. Which saves you a ton of time! And unless you automate your posts to share all over social media, you are exchanging your precious time for ‘potential’ money. Automating posts, instead of sharing them manually over and over again, gives you your life back and allows you to be more productive, writing another blog post, writing a book, or article, and allows you to do what ever else you want and still be seen to be all over social media.

This is a peek into my Missing Lettr Dashboard. This particular profile which I have connected, is my blog on my www.asexualise.com site. Each blog post I have already posted (published) once, automatically appears in my dashboard and then asks me to review the marketing posting campaign for the entire year that they have created for me, this is like having your own social media marketing team, permanently by your side, for a fraction of the cost it would take you to hire just one marketing person on your team to do all this for you, in fact you would likely have to hire more than one person if you have multiple social media profiles like me. Missing Lettr will automatically have suggested dates to post throughout the year, based on what are going to be the most popular times to post, to gain maximum exposure. All you have to do is approve (or reject) the campaign for each of the profiles you have selected to post to and ensure you have made a choice about which one of their variations you want to use for each of your social media profiles.

Missing Lettr are officially approved by Facebook, so if you use them, you won’t get any warnings from Facebook which threaten your continued use of your account. If you want to post to your Facebook Groups, all you do is authorise them as an App that is allowed to post on your behalf, in your settings for that particular group. Each Twitter account, Facebook Page or Facebook group you attach to Missing Lettr, have suggested variations for each single profile you have connected, so you select and copy the suggestion you want and hey presto, you have the most amazing copy for sharing your posts, without even writing a single word of copy yourself – unless you want to, as you can add your own words to personalise it more. Much better than having to hire an expensive copywriter or take an expensive copywriting course to learn that skill for yourself! In my experience, you can learn quickly what sorts of copy draw in people to your posts, when you see their suggestions and monitor your stats within your dashboard to see the outcome of sharing your posts!

So here I have a blog post in my Missing Lettr Dashboard about my Fibromyalgia Self-Help Handbook: How To Manage Fibromyalgia, Have Less Pain, More Energy, Feel Happier, Like A Superhero Rockstar! Which is also suitable for anyone who has depression and anxiety and wants to change their life, and turn it around, for the better, forever. The profiles highlighted in red with an exclamation mark, are the ones I have not yet decided which copy to use, and the others in green (Facebook) and blue (Twitter), I have decided on and chosen from their suggestions.

 

This following screenshots, are 3 more variations they suggested for me in this particular instance.

If you want to put your blog posts on autopilot AND get 50% off (for 3 months) to try it out, I joined the Missing Lettr affiliate team because I love what they do and have used the platform myself for some time so I know they are sound. They gave me a special code to give to my followers so you can get 50% off for those first 3 months of joining. The best thing is there are absolutely no contracts, so you can cancel at any time. Here’s the link to get started https://goo.gl/bc3wLu You will be so glad you did. Once you start using Missing Lettr, you will wonder how you ever lived without it, as it takes care of all the hard work for you, so you don’t have to, and you can continue to enjoy doing what you love and blog to your heart’s content, knowing that your content will be shared with the masses and you can leave a lasting legacy and impression in their own hearts’ and minds’, long after you are gone. Change your blogging life and theirs’, click here to get started now https://goo.gl/bc3wLu.

If you have any questions, comments, or thoughts about this post, I would love to hear from you. Leave them down below and I will reply as soon as I can.

As always, stay quirky and write soon.

Sandra xx

P.S. If you didn’t know what it means to be an affiliate, it means that if you join a company’s affiliate programme, and you promote or recommend them to someone and they click through your affiliate link, then you may get paid some monetary compensation for it. This is no different to selling products in a physical store and getting a commission on them. It costs the customer no more, but the company you are working for or with, gives you some money for the referral if it’s within a certain time frame and meets their terms and conditions, as it’s money they would not usually have had unless you told that customer about them. I have clicked through another person’s affiliate links before, if it costs me no more money, then why wouldn’t I help someone like that and pay it forward, after all, they are helping me out by informing me about this thing I knew nothing about in the first place and I like helping people out! It makes me feel good, knowing I did this for someone. So if you do click through my special link that will get you 50% off for the first 3 months of using Missing Lettr and you can cancel at any time with no contracts, and I do receive some monetary compensation because of it, I would like to thank you very much and say I really appreciate it. xx

Why making time for you is a must!


Sometimes the noise of life gets in the way. Sometimes we take on too much. Or sometimes we are just too in demand. And maybe we love that for a time, but without a break, you can have a meltdown and reach burnout!

In this video I explain why making time for you is a must, not an option but a must!

Have you ever reached burnout? How did you deal with it? I love to read you, so please comment below!

Until next time, stay very quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

 

How To Overcome Setbacks: My 12 Simple Step Formula How To Overcome Setbacks! Happy New Year 2018!


How To Deal With Setbacks!

My 12 Simple Step Formula How To Overcome Setbacks!

Happy New Year 2018!

So last year I had a number of setbacks in succession. First I was made redundant from my day job of 5 years that I enjoyed, 2 days later, 10 of my websites got hacked and my account was suspended by my web host for all of my sites. It took me about 7 weeks to finally get them all back online virus free, databases mended, security learned to a high degree and installed on each with backup, and to redesign some and put coming soon notifications on the others – as I am changing some of them anyway this year (blessing in disguise?). The guy I was with turned out not to be so nice so I split with him and my printer did not work for 3 weeks – I fixed it and now it has stopped working again! My fibro book is yet to be finished, I have written the meat but need to rearrange some of the chapters!

My simple 12 step formula for how to overcome setbacks:

  1. Believe everything happens for a reason good or bad – this stops the ‘why me syndrome’, and know that life is forcing you to change paths somehow for your own good, you aren’t living up to your full life potential and you need to be on another path.
  2. Know that things often come in a succession but it is better to get all the s..t out and got rid of in one long go than keep getting lots of ups and downs (preferably short go) but accept that life is full of ups and downs anyway.
  3. Always remember when there are a ton of downs, law of averages means there is going to be a lot of ups coming your way.
  4. Remain positive! Have a positive attitude to life and use positive self-talk!
  5. Say, bring it on, I am stronger than you think and I can deal with anything life throws my way.
  6. Know that life will be struggle and expect it, so when it comes it is not as shocking.
  7. Believe in yourself and your ability to work things out.
  8. See all obstacles as challenges that you will gladly overcome.
  9. Know there are no failures, just lessons to learn from – therefore you can never truly fail.
  10. Believe it is better to have struggles, challenges, and be stretched, to develop and grow yourself into a stronger version of you than to stagnate in life and never change.
  11. See change as a good thing.
  12. Always count your blessings and be thankful and grateful for what you do have and that you are alive.

I hope that helps you.

As always, stay quirky and write soon.

Happy New Year 2018.

Lots of love and hugs xx

Sandra xx

Happy 2018 deal with setbacks pics

 

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Famous At Last! – Well Sort Of! Why? Good Question!!!!


So why am I famous at last?? Good question!! Because I am in Corey Poirier’s new book – The Book of Why and How! – Secrets to Success and Abundance! If you haven’t got yourself a copy yet, and I strongly urge you to do so, you can visit www.thebookofwhy.com Corey is a multiple-time TEDX Speaker, Award Winning Speaker, Thought-Leader and Best-Selling Author, and all round good guy!! A book changed his life, and he has interviewed tons of thought-leaders and experts for this book, to help you to change your own life!! He just loves to give back. What are you waiting for, go grab yourself a copy of The Book Of Why, and change life for the better, forever!! Remember, it only takes one new piece of information, to lead to a new way of thinking, and a new way of life!!

Book of why

As always, stay quirky! Oh and www.sandrabellamy.com got a complete redesign – check it out if you dare!!!! And let me know what you think?

Lots of love and hugs

Sandra xxxx