ASEXUAL LOVE AT LAST! LOVE WITHOUT SEX DEFINITELY EXISTS!


So after being single for almost 6 years, and searching for my Asexual soulmate for over 3 years since 2014 on Asexual dating sites www.asexualitic.com and www.ace-book.net , I finally found him in my own Asexualise Dating Facebook group, that is strictly for asexuals only, who want to date and find a committed forever relationship/s without sex ever. So from Monday 1st of October we became in an official asexual relationship. I am really thrilled about this, love without sex definitely exists with us.

Asexuality is a sexual orientation, that is barely unheard of and deeply misunderstood. It means a lack of sexual attraction that makes up about 1% of the world population, that is 1 in every 100 are asexual.

So in broad terms an asexual person is someone who does not get the need, urge, or want, for partnered sex (intercourse). Although some may still have it to please their sexual partner or because they enjoy it as an activity to do, like a board game. I have had sex in the past but would rather not have done. That was before I realised I am a heteroromantic asexual, not a heterosexual. I actually define myself as a Heteroromantic, Hyper-romantic, Grey A, Asexual, Younger Cougar, who does not like sex, just kissing. That means I get attracted romantically to the opposite sex – guys, just not sexually; I am extremely romantic to the extent that would be incomprehensible to some who are not like that, so I can fall in love easily, over a few texts messages or Skype sessions for example – I have been managing that well, so trying to refrain from doing that, but yeah, I love my guy, but we have known each more than that, so it’s fine. And I literally love the romance that Disney movies are made of and making it come to reality! I feel loved up almost 24/7 just with myself!

I have grey areas, so my body gets aroused, but I still have no need, want or urge, for sex, ever.

I am Grey A, which I define as having Grey Areas, because I experience high levels of arousal and can get aroused in my body, by myself, without touching anything or thinking about anyone, or from just thinking about the word aroused, or thinking about kissing, and also by actual kissing. I never go to look at porn, that is personally yuk to me, and if I happen to talk about sex, which happens more as I help a lot of people discover if they are asexual or not, and asexuals often talk more about what they physically can and can’t cope with and like than sexuals do, or I see some sexual images by accident pop up in my Twitter feed for example – and I block them, unfortunately it can set off my arousal, even though I hate sex and sex personally repulses me these days, for me – not for others. People think arousal and sexual attraction are the same thing but they are not, although for sexuals they can be intertwined, as one can instantly lead to the other, for asexuals they are usually separate. Just think, if you touch your genitalia, you are likely to get aroused – think masturbation, but for asexuals, if they do that, it is usually to release arousal feelings with no desire for sex. Some do it for other reasons such as to de-stress or use it as a tool to go to sleep.

I am an asexual cougar means I get attracted to guys who are younger than me and in my case usually foreign, (although my soulmate is British born he still has a foreign looking face from his mum’s side of the family), and I only want a relationship with a younger guy but to be romantic with, kiss, cuddle, hold hands, not have sex with. A nd in my case I am also nudity repulsed and have no desire to see a guy naked below the waist.

My Asexual guy lives in London in the UK and can relocate, he is also a heteroromantic, hyper-romantic and sex repulsed. He is not into nudity either, but loves passionate kissing like I do and is quite happy to be with someone older in birth certificate age. Although younger, he is older in birth certificate age than I would usually go for, and he is not that much younger, but it doesn’t matter as he is adorable and looks younger in person and has an incredibly amazing personality and I feel so lucky and blessed to have found him, at last!! We both like doing young stuff.  We have quite a lot of other stuff in common and get on really well and he is coming to see me for 5 days next month and I can’t wait. I am super excited about that!

If you want to know more about asexuality, I wrote a book called Asexual Perspectives 47 Asexual Stories, Love, Life and Sex, ACElebration of Asexual Diversity, and I have a website www.asexualise.com, and be sure to like www.facebook.com/acexualise And you can find the biggest online community of asexuals at www.asexuality.org

I would love to read your feedback on this.

Have you heard of asexuality before?

If you have a partner, whether they are sexual or asexual, how long did it take to find the partner of your dreams?

Until next time, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

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WHY SEXUALS SHOULD GET ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES BOOK??


Asexual Perspectives print book
Author Sandra Bellamy With Her Asexual Perspectives Paperback Book

If Kindle books are available in your country, you have NO excuses not to get it. You don’t have to have a Kindle as you can download the Kindle AP to almost any device. CLICK HERE http://amzn.to/2u5Q2EA TO GET IT, OR HERE http://amzn.to/2sO3sB4 if you live in the UK. (Please note that not all countries have Amazon Kindles books. You can still buy the paperback edition on Amazon or request it from your local book store!! (And soon you will be able to buy a digital copy on my own Quirky Books E Book Store).

So I hear you say, why would I want an asexual book, when I love sex and am not asexual, right??? Because 1% of the population, IS ASEXUAL and this means that 1 in 100 people you come across in your life, IS ASEXUAL. This means you could end up talking to an asexual, being friends with an asexual, dating an asexual, wanting a relationship with an asexual, and falling in love with an asexual!! And how is that type of relationship dynamic going to work???? If you do not understand what this misunderstood and often unheard of sexual orientation, is about??? Sure, you can stay ignorant, uneducated and shrug it off as you do not need to know, but I am sure if you fall in love with an asexual and want to get married, live with, and have kids with an asexual, then you will NEED to understand your partner. After all, it is a partnership that requires understanding of both of your sexual orientations.

Heterosexuality, is often talked about and not kept in darkness, but even so, you still have needs and those needs are individual to you!! An asexual has their own asexual needs, within their sometimes more complex orientation and the sooner you grasp the foundations of what your love one requires in that relationship, the sooner you can find that deep emotional connection and bond, that will stand the test of time, long after your bits are not doing what you wished them to anymore.

Shop now, write soon, and keep being QUIRKY YOU – always!! xx Sandra (Aka Asexualise and Quirky Books)