ASEXUAL LOVE AT LAST! LOVE WITHOUT SEX DEFINITELY EXISTS!


So after being single for almost 6 years, and searching for my Asexual soulmate for over 3 years since 2014 on Asexual dating sites www.asexualitic.com and www.ace-book.net , I finally found him in my own Asexualise Dating Facebook group, that is strictly for asexuals only, who want to date and find a committed forever relationship/s without sex ever. So from Monday 1st of October we became in an official asexual relationship. I am really thrilled about this, love without sex definitely exists with us.

Asexuality is a sexual orientation, that is barely unheard of and deeply misunderstood. It means a lack of sexual attraction that makes up about 1% of the world population, that is 1 in every 100 are asexual.

So in broad terms an asexual person is someone who does not get the need, urge, or want, for partnered sex (intercourse). Although some may still have it to please their sexual partner or because they enjoy it as an activity to do, like a board game. I have had sex in the past but would rather not have done. That was before I realised I am a heteroromantic asexual, not a heterosexual. I actually define myself as a Heteroromantic, Hyper-romantic, Grey A, Asexual, Younger Cougar, who does not like sex, just kissing. That means I get attracted romantically to the opposite sex – guys, just not sexually; I am extremely romantic to the extent that would be incomprehensible to some who are not like that, so I can fall in love easily, over a few texts messages or Skype sessions for example – I have been managing that well, so trying to refrain from doing that, but yeah, I love my guy, but we have known each more than that, so it’s fine. And I literally love the romance that Disney movies are made of and making it come to reality! I feel loved up almost 24/7 just with myself!

I have grey areas, so my body gets aroused, but I still have no need, want or urge, for sex, ever.

I am Grey A, which I define as having Grey Areas, because I experience high levels of arousal and can get aroused in my body, by myself, without touching anything or thinking about anyone, or from just thinking about the word aroused, or thinking about kissing, and also by actual kissing. I never go to look at porn, that is personally yuk to me, and if I happen to talk about sex, which happens more as I help a lot of people discover if they are asexual or not, and asexuals often talk more about what they physically can and can’t cope with and like than sexuals do, or I see some sexual images by accident pop up in my Twitter feed for example – and I block them, unfortunately it can set off my arousal, even though I hate sex and sex personally repulses me these days, for me – not for others. People think arousal and sexual attraction are the same thing but they are not, although for sexuals they can be intertwined, as one can instantly lead to the other, for asexuals they are usually separate. Just think, if you touch your genitalia, you are likely to get aroused – think masturbation, but for asexuals, if they do that, it is usually to release arousal feelings with no desire for sex. Some do it for other reasons such as to de-stress or use it as a tool to go to sleep.

I am an asexual cougar means I get attracted to guys who are younger than me and in my case usually foreign, (although my soulmate is British born he still has a foreign looking face from his mum’s side of the family), and I only want a relationship with a younger guy but to be romantic with, kiss, cuddle, hold hands, not have sex with. A nd in my case I am also nudity repulsed and have no desire to see a guy naked below the waist.

My Asexual guy lives in London in the UK and can relocate, he is also a heteroromantic, hyper-romantic and sex repulsed. He is not into nudity either, but loves passionate kissing like I do and is quite happy to be with someone older in birth certificate age. Although younger, he is older in birth certificate age than I would usually go for, and he is not that much younger, but it doesn’t matter as he is adorable and looks younger in person and has an incredibly amazing personality and I feel so lucky and blessed to have found him, at last!! We both like doing young stuff.  We have quite a lot of other stuff in common and get on really well and he is coming to see me for 5 days next month and I can’t wait. I am super excited about that!

If you want to know more about asexuality, I wrote a book called Asexual Perspectives 47 Asexual Stories, Love, Life and Sex, ACElebration of Asexual Diversity, and I have a website www.asexualise.com, and be sure to like www.facebook.com/acexualise And you can find the biggest online community of asexuals at www.asexuality.org

I would love to read your feedback on this.

Have you heard of asexuality before?

If you have a partner, whether they are sexual or asexual, how long did it take to find the partner of your dreams?

Until next time, stay quirky and write soon

Sandra xx

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​Asexual Perspectives 47 Asexual Stories Book Review On Pride Matters Blog!


My Asexual Perspectives 47 Asexual Stories book was reviewed on Pride Matters Blog Source: ​Asexual Perspectives 

ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES QUIRKY BOOKS UNBOXING VIDEO FROM AN ASEXUAL FAN! #APAM


This awesome Asexual Perspectives Unboxing video is from an avid Asexualise fan. I could feel his excitement come through the screen. Watch it and see what you think!!

I feel so very blessed to have interviewed 46 Asexuals around the globe for this 560 page book – it is a very different Asexual book!!! And it feels wonderful as an author, to know that my book is making a difference to other’s lives, this is why my number one passion is writing – the ability to literally change lives through the written word, just cannot be beat. And when it is teamed with my other passion, asexuality, it feels like I am floating on a bed of aceness!! Thanks for all your support, stay quirky and write soon xx Get the book here http://amzn.to/2tu7EsE And it is on Amazon Expanded Distribution so you can request it in book stores!!

Asexual Perspectives Print Edition – More Book for Your Buck!


After having problems with the typesetting of my Asexual Perspectives book, and not being able to edit the work of the original typesetter because he had used a programme called Latex, which you need to know how to code to use it; and being left with a PDF that was unpublishable due to the incorrect Prologue being in the book (it was omitted when it shouldn’t have been; and the wrong one added back in), and the TOC numbered incorrectly in two places and faulty source files with incorrect gaps throughout – after a few tearing out my hair sessions, I finally found a free PDF to word converter, here it is if you should need to use it https://smallpdf.com/pdf-to-word so I could work on editing a previous version, without the gaps and correcting the mistakes, including a few grammar and spelling errors on my part too.

After painstaking months of working with the typesetter since January, and another 3 nights last week, working on all the issues, I am relieved that I could finally print this final 560 page book proof, before ordering a copy to check from Amazon, and then hitting the publish button to the world. It must have been edited well over 15 times, considering all the editing I did prior to the typesetting, and it has gone through a final proof read and edit these past two days, and I am doing the typing up of those as we speak. I love writing but all the book formatting stuff is tough!! I want to get back to my soul love of writing – yes, I said soul – because without writing in my life, my soul feels like it has a part of it missing. But I am also going to start doing online training courses too.

I have not tried Facebook Ads before, but I am going to with this book, when I have a copy in my hands and it is published. If you are a writer, have you ever tried Facebook Ads before? I did a high level marketing course last year, so going to use what I learnt in that for the AD. I feel a lot more confident doing this, as I am also a registered publisher under Quirky Books!

Making a full-time living out of writing, is my dream, and I really want to write more books for asexuals, as this is my huge specialist niche, so please wish me luck and a lot of sales with the AD!! With 560 pages of insights into asexuality and how asexuals survive in a sexualised world; and busting through many asexual myths and stereotypes about love, live and sex, including arousal and masturbation, it will be an intriguing read for both asexuals and non-asexuals alike!! It is told in the voices of 46 different asexuals around the globe and my own, and took me almost a year to interview for it and write it, so the readers are getting more book for their buck!! And an educational, humorous, journey too!!

As always, stay quirky and write soon.

Sandra xx

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ASEXUAL PERSPECTIVES: 47 ASEXUAL STORIES: 5 STAR BOOK REVIEW ON AMAZON!


Asexual Perspectives Book
Asexual Perspectives: 47 Asexual Stories: Love, Life and Sex, ACElebration of Asexual Diversity.
I wanted to share with you, that I have had an amazing book review for Asexual Perspectives on Amazon. .
Top Customer Reviews
5.0 out of 5 stars – before there was the relative wealth of information and acknowledgement that there is today – I think this book is a great idea
By David1879 on 10 Mar. 2017
Verified Purchase
I’m writing this as someone who realised and rationalised his own asexuality a while back, before there was the relative wealth of information and acknowledgement that there is today – I think this book is a great idea and could be beneficial for many reasons. A few of the contributors have found ways to explain in such relatable terms, something that may be a struggle to put across to somebody who may be unfamiliar of asexuality. Any young people who may feel unsure of themselves or those just beginning to explore the possibility that they may be asexual should find something that rings true to them in this book. I’m sure it will be a helpful tool to them, showing them that many others have had this experience. Or allowing them to find a way to tell a friend or family member with clarity that ‘I am ace, and what that means is…’.
And for older aces, or even those just curious about asexuality- taken as a collection of experiences, it’s interesting to discover the common ground and massive variations across all the entries. For some it’s an intrinsic part of their personality and for others it’s a mundane fact they barely give a thought to.
If it had been around when I was younger it would have provided a certain amount of relief to come across this book and I hope it will do that for others now it’s here.
I have also changed my book cover wording to now read Asexual Perspectives: 47 Asexual Stories: Love, Life and Sex, ACElebration of Asexual Diversity. ( I added the stories part.)
To buy from Amazon UK: http://amzn.to/2mQcAoL
To buy from Amazon USA: http://amzn.to/2mBzj7u
As always, stay quirky xx